Of the Century

Food for thought! I haven't posted anything related to a Cautionary Tale lately and this definitely qualifies. Originally posted on PDN Pulse, via this link here:

Is It a Photographer’s Fault We Don’t Know Where Jimmy Hoffa is Buried?

Best-selling biographer Kitty Kelley appeared on the NPR program called “On the Media” on Sunday to defend the art of unauthorized biographies. Host Bob Garfield asked her why people she interviews (those close to Nancy Reagan, Jacqueline Onassis, and Frank Sinatra, among Kelley’s other subjects) deny afterwards that they ever talked to her. Garfield also asked, “And what happens when you present them with the smoking gun of their participation?”

Kelley answered with a long anecdote about taking photographer Stanley Tretick along on an interview with Frank Sinatra, Jr. He later denied ever having granted the interview to Kelley. “And Stanley produced a photograph,” Kelley told Garfield triumphantly.

But oh, the price of Tretick’s help! He interrupted the interview, ruined everything and changed the course of history, according to Kelley. As she explained to Garfield:

“Everything is going wonderfully well for the first 45 minutes. [Frank Jr. is] talking about what it’s like to be the son of a famous singer, a man connected to organized crime…

“And then he turned to me and he said, you know, hon, I know a lot of people. Do you know what I mean? And I said, you mean mobsters? And he said, yes. I can tell you what happened to Jimmy Hoffa. And right at that point, I thought, oh, the one great unsolved mystery of the 20th century! I thought, maybe I’ll get the Pulitzer Prize. I even thought for, you know, just a second, what’ll I wear when I get the prize?

“And just at that point, there was this clattering noise. The photographer threw down his cameras and said, well, what the hell happened to Jimmy Hoffa? And at that point, Frank Sinatra [Jr.] ran out of the room into the bedroom. And I tried. He said, no, I have said too much, I have said too much. The interview ended.”

Of course, Frank Jr. may know squat about what happened to Jimmy Hoffa. And Tretick, who died in 1999, is no longer around to defend himself. But the moral of the story is: When a famous writer hires you to take pictures, don’t interrupt when the subject is about to solve the mystery of the century.

Santa Claus Sighting

Sorry, false alarm. Couldn't help myself. The real Santa Claus hasn't been seen in decades, not since he was killed by a jet in 1963. He's been impersonated by ninjas ever since. But the good news is that MJ and Elvis are alive and hanging tight, probably waiting for Lisa Marie to bring them some grilled PB & Banana sandwiches. That's a sight for sore eyes. Or rather, a sight that gives sore eyes...

Not Out of the Woods Yet

After reading the unfortunate news about Tiger today, I spent time on a personal project drawing on some sly humor. Referencing one of my favorite movies from the 90's, the final result serves up a wicked play on words. I don't know when Tiger will pull himself out of the media hell he's plunged into, but this goes to show that the higher your celebrity rises the harder your fall becomes. Out of all my Cautionary Tales, I consider this one the most important yet.

Cautionary Tales: "S" is for Waldo

It's been awhile since I posted a cautionary tale, but this is another potent example of what happens with careless fingers and lazy proofreading. I noticed this blatant typo while taking the Tacoma transit one day. Apparently the bus that travels to the Tacoma mall is magical because it runs on the weekdays and also on "Satursdays" too. I don't understand how something like this could escape notice during the printing process, but I felt like I had encountered Waldo that morning at the bus stop.

Cautionary Tales: Believe (You Better Believe It)

Sometimes I'm amazed at what can happen with print media. Fierce spelling and grammar mistakes + lack of a good copy editor = national distribution of a laughable DVD cover. I found this gem of a blunder while flipping through an old magazine of LDS Living a few days ago. The tragic thing is that the person who created the DVD cover actually managed to follow the "I-before-E" concept twice before failing horribly on the third try. Take a look for yourself, and always remember: keep your friends close, your enemies closer and most importantly, leave the spellcheck on!

Cautionary Tales: Lighting Tests and Googly Eyes

Sometimes there are moments where it's best that I work behind a camera and not in front of it. When in front of a camera, there are too many temptations and impulses that compel me to make a fool of myself. Today I encountered one of those moments. Setting up a lighting test yielded this moment of ridiculousness. Alas, I couldn't get a copy of the original image, so I had to settle for my grainy camera-phone. Enjoy!

Be Careful What You Wish For...

Craigslist is often a source of jobs and gigs for any creative that knows to visit on a regular basis. At times, though, some of the gigs posted are too rich for words. Such as the following:

beautiful/hansome pool person (Burien)

I am having a party for my daughter and need someone to stay by the pool for 3 hours.There will be other adults with the kids (mostly 11 year olds)but last time I could not count on them to stay there or make sure another adult was supervising.You can wear your suit,lay in the sun,swim and eat.I would prefer someone very attractive as I feel it will help to keep some of the adults by the pool.I need you to be there on Friday July 24th from 3pm-6pm.Please reply with photo.

• Location: Burien
• it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
• Compensation: $30 cash

For $30? That doesn't sound like too much pay. Seems like this woman is fishing among the dregs for this one. She's obviously not going for the refined, well mannered cabana boys with a payment like that. They say be careful what you wish for, but can you imagine this poor mother's reaction if she received a photo like this one attached to an email?

I don't know if it's only me, but that guy is exactly the type of person I see responding to the ad. Perhaps this woman should save herself the hassle and stay by the pool on this one. Me? I'm flagging the ad for Best of Craigslist. Consider this another cautionary tale from the guy bringing you the vitamins for your optic nerves.

Because a Diamond is Forever

Call this a cautionary tale. Going through some old text messages the other day, I found this gem (I guess the pun was intended) of a picture message I sent out back in March. While assisting Ken Hayden on an architectural shoot, I found the following picture in an old magazine jewelry ad:

Now, just because a diamond is forever doesn't mean you throw in a poorly placed lens flare. This isn't a JJ Abrams movie. Why, oh why, did they place a lens flare on her right hand? It looks very.... suggestive. To say the least. I do think that this is my favorite jewelry ad in the world. I wish I could say who the ad was for. Perhaps De Beers? I don't know. But this goes to show that adding unnecessary special effects just for the sake of doing so doesn't always produce the desired result. Chalk up another cautionary tale for the blog. :D